Forgetting Through Poop, Memories Through Food

This essay will not make much sense to anyone who eats their own poop. Like how any other metaphor can break down, so can this one, but only to those who eat their own fecal matter. Throughout Daniel Nayeri’s novel Everything Sad is Untrue (A True Story), he discusses many stories that center around poop and food. While these may be topics that are unexpected for a memoir of this kind, they are integral, as they serve as a metaphor for memories and the process of forgetting those same memories. Some will disagree with this due to the fact that, at face value, they seem more likely to be included for comic relief in an otherwise serious book focused on the life of a refugee. I disagree with them and instead believe that food and poop are metaphors for our memories, experiences, and how we as people inevitably forget the past.

First, it is important to note the importance that memories play throughout this novel. Memories are what shape the interactions we have every day. Whether or not people are conscious of how they are being affected by them is not important; I believe that it is impossible for someone’s emotions and actions to be separated from their memories. Through Nayeri’s writing, we see many times where his past memories impact the story. One occasion of note is when the memories affect the writing of the novel itself. Throughout the course of the novel, one of the main antagonistic forces is Ray, Daniel’s abusive stepdad. We know Daniel has an aversion to violence from his past memories and when he recounts stories of Ray’s abuse, but during the final confrontation with Ray, Nayeri wrote, “Ray walked into the house. They fought. I will spare you the details. Fighting is never poetry. It is always bad story telling” (344). While he says he will spare the reader the details, the next page is full of them. Daniel believes that he does not want to tell us, but the importance of his memories also makes it so that he needed to tell us. This is just one example of how his memories shape him without his knowledge. Now, how does food factor into this? Food impacts Daniel’s memories specifically. Daniel tells us many stories related to food, because that is what he has the most memories of from his homeland. He also recounts these because food is what is being forced into his body by his innate need for sustenance. For example, the details of the fight with Ray were forced into the story due to the effect that memories have on Nayeri. These memories, though, are not all-powerful over us. Different memories affect different actions, just as different foods help your body in different ways. On that same note, one of the things that Daniel works the hardest to remember is the recipes of his homeland. He wants to be able to create memories, and food is just how he chooses to do that. But, by placing that emphasis on the food, it is allowed to take much more meaning.

The second part of this metaphor is more subtextual and requires more analysis, and it is known as experiences. For the purposes of this metaphor and essay, memories and experiences are very different. Memories impact our actions, but experiences are what shape our perceptions of our memories. Experiences may not always have the same visible effect on people, but they are still an important aspect of this metaphor. The best way of explaining its relation to food is that memories are the actions our bodies take using the nutrients from our bodies, which are the experiences. Without experiences causing us to perceive things certain ways, we would not know why we view certain memories with certain emotions. The best example of this in the subject novel is how Daniel viewed the slaughtering of the bull at the beginning of the story. Specifically, Daniel wrote that he saw the slaughter as something, “where you realize it’s your fault that something beautiful is dead. And you know you weren’t worth the trouble” (Nayeri 9). Daniel’s memory of this event causes him to actively avoid violence, but his experience of this event is what drives him to see that violence as evil and barbaric. Though, we learn at the end of this book, experiences can be flawed. False experiences are able to warp our perception of what has actually happened in our lives. Notably, Daniel is able to fix his perception by asking his mother about this memory, because he wanted to know more about his experiences. Daniel had to learn that this memory that he associated with violence and his worth was truly about peace, mercy, and taking care of others; things that are almost direct opposites of each other. We control the ways our experiences affect our views, but only if we take the action to be mindful of them.

The last aspect of this metaphor is poop: specifically, how it is used to represent forgetting our memories. Memories are something we love to have, just like food is something we love to have. Forgetting memories is something that just has to happen, just like poop is something that has to happen, because we simply cannot hold everything that has every happened in our mind. Just like how poop has to happen to keep us healthy since we cannot contain all the food we have ever ate. While there is not much evidence to directly tie poop to forgetting, we can look at the subtext of the story to attribute forgetting to poop for the sakes of this metaphor. One of the most important moments where Daniel acknowledges his forgetting is when he wonders, “Did I ever hug Baba Haji? What was that like?” (Nayeri 49). Now this is not the only thing that Daniel acknowledges that he forgets, but I find particular significance in this specific memory. Daniel’s earliest memory is of his Baba Haji, which means he had been very present in his life. Forgetting was not something that he got to choose to do. It comes fast, it comes unexpectedly, and it comes for what you least want it to. To tie this in with my beliefs of how this is a metaphor, poop can come really fast, always unexpectedly, and of course, when we do not want it to. The final point to tie this all together is noting that, without food, we cannot poop. Without memories, one cannot forget. People must not let the fear of something they cannot predict stop them, just like how Daniel’s fear of forgetting did not stop his from forming more and more memories.

Now, some may disagree with this metaphor on the grounds that these stories are simply for comic relief. They may try say when analyzing the subtext that memories and experience instead offer a look at Nayeri’s personality. Specifically, they may note that Nayeri writes, “For now, here’s a poop story to make you feel better. Or if not better, then at least distracted” (Nayeri 173). This may be seen by those readers as him trying to cope and make light of the situation with his humor. I can understand that point of view, but then why did the following poop stories deal with him becoming even more ostracized from his classmates? Instead, we know these stories are important and have meaning because, in an interview discussing this novel, Nayeri said, “You know I think pastry factors into it, and so does actually a lot of poop stories; because it’s not just the story about the existential [and] the spiritual. It’s also the story about just everyday survival” (Nayeri). He himself admits that these two things factor into deep topics of spirituality, existentialism, and survival. Therefore, by taking into account Nayeri’s perspective, these stories are extremely important when dealing with themes of racism and being ostracized. These stories are part of a much larger metaphor than something that would simply be about comic relief.

In the end, if we are able to understand poop and food under this metaphor, then we are able to see the importance of the natural flow of memories throughout our lives. Memories shape our actions and the courses we take. Experiences shape our views and our reasons for being the people we are to become. Forgetting, the one thing that no one wants, ultimately plays the pivotal role of freeing us to create and view more, the ability to truly and continually grow in our lives. We need to allow this conscious look at these things to impact our daily lives, just as someone who eats and poops. People cannot allow themselves to let the fear of forgetting stop them from making memories; because if you do, then you become the person who eats their own poop just to keep that one thing circulating in them with nothing new to truly sustain you.

Works Cited

Nayeri, Daniel. Everything Sad is Untrue (A True Story). Levine Querido, 2020.

Nayeri, Daniel. “Daniel Nayeli Author of Everything Sad Is Untrue (A True Story) Baking with Mom Interview.” YouTube, Christ Community Church, 21 Sept. 2021, youtu.be/GALNYyJMgTI?si=U91_LI1IdbDxoMD9.